This Is What Thirty-Something Looks Like
Thank you for all of the birthday wishes last week!
My family and I were all fighting off sickness two weekends ago, all the way until my birthday, so I was grateful to wake up and sneak away to grab breakfast alone with a good book.
If you know me, you know that my ideal birthday — today and perhaps forever and always — will be time alone, reading good books in silence, journaling, and eating good food (food cooked for me, that is). Despite the sickness in the family and the attempts to catch up on all the things, I was able to get pockets of time to do just that.
I woke up to my husband (who was very much still recovering from sickness — God bless him) lining up all the kids as they sang and performed a coordinated dance to Happy Birthday.
Yep, I got emotional seeing all five of my kiddos lined up next to each other on their own two legs. It seems like yesterday — because it quite literally was — when I had one or two of them on my hip.
I then went out for breakfast, ran a few errands, received a few FaceTime calls from my parents and sisters, and came back to make the kiddos lunch.
After lunch, the kiddos and I went to the park for a few hours so my hubby could rest. The weather was absolutely beautiful. It felt like island weather — the breeze, the humidity, the temperature. Just breathtaking. Then I went home, made dinner, and headed back out to eat alone in silence.
It might sound depressing, but when you're an introvert surrounded by little people all day, silence and being alone is the sweetest gift.
Of course, a birthday shouldn't end without a stroll through Hobby Lobby… and that I did! While I was there, I realized I needed to get back home because my kids were calling and asking when it was time to cut the cake. I had promised them we would all make one together.
Well, I got home at 8pm, which meant we all ate cake close to 9:15pm. Our youngest, twenty months old, couldn't hang — but the rest of my kiddos were up like there was no tomorrow.
The plan was to make a double-layered, freshly milled, sourdough lemon cake with no refined sugar. And well... I over-fermented the dough and didn't let the first layer cool completely before flipping it onto the plate. In the back of my mind, I heard my grandmother’s voice to let the pan cool. But my hands were moving faster than my thoughts. The cake broke apart instantly.
Let's just say we had a very crumbly, sourdough (emphasis on the sour) double-layered lemon cake.
My oldest daughter and I loved it.
My oldest son suggested that I add refined sugar next time.
And my husband? He made an expression of complete shock and disdain on his first bite that he absolutely could not hide, though he tried. 😂
So yes, that was my birthday — some silence, a park date with the kids, and me wondering whether I should try that cake recipe again or scrap it altogether.
I won't lie. There are moments in this season of life where I find myself pouting, wondering when my husband and I will get a few days alone on a faraway beach somewhere, with all the kids taken care of and accounted for. But the Lord knows. That day will come, and it may be here before we know it. We laugh and say we'll miss these days... but not all of them.
But miss them we certainly will.
This cake will always be a reminder of how my life feels in this season. God’s Messy Masterpiece lol.